Manage Anger, or else anger will punish you. We do not punish others with our anger, but ourselves. Understand the effects of anger, and how anger management can help you.
No two people will react and feel the same about a situation. If we see something unfair or wrong happening – one person might stand up and fight it, another one might call someone to help, and some might even walk away. These are the common three strategies that we use, fight, fight, and avoid.
Understand and Manage Anger
Anger is an Emotion in which one has a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure, or hostility. Like any other emotion, it is only human to experience Anger…..but not being able to manage it and being carried away by it is what needs to be looked at.
Effects of Anger
We all know the effects Anger has on our body like an increased heart rate, increased blood pressure, tightening of muscles, etc which can lead to even to a heart attack/stroke. If we realize the harm uncontrolled Anger can cause not just to us physically but also to our relationships, that is the first step in moving forward.
Responses to Anger
There are three basic approaches to responding to anger: Expression, Suppression, and Management.
Expression and Suppression are two extremes, blowing up or holding it in — neither is healthy. Managing anger well is about acknowledging anger as a normal emotion, paying attention to it, and making choices that allow us to improve our situations. To manage our anger we need to increase our AWARENESS, COOL IT and THINK!
Learn to Manage Anger
Be AWARE of Anger
The answers to the following questions will help in understanding my Anger…each person’s anger is different.
- What makes me angry?
- How angry do I get?
- What do I do when I get angry?
- How long do I stay angry?
One can learn to improve self-awareness so that emotional awareness improves. Emotional awareness is necessary to manage anger.
Take Steps to COOL Your Anger
As each person’s anger is different the way we cool off is also different. What might work for one might not work for the other…
Delay and Cool Down
- Count to 10 (really angry, count to 100!)
- Drink a glass of water
- Take Deep Breaths
Distract and Cool Down
- Take a walk or march…coordinating your steps with the count will take your mind of things
- Move away from the situation
Relax to Cool Down
- Listen to music
- Take a nap
- Play with a pet or a baby
- Watch a comedy
THINK Right and Manage Anger
Once you are calm and can analyze the situation logically THINK. You should realize that Anger does not punish others, but harms your own self. Thinking right is to put yourself first. Why harm yourself?
- Differentiate between fact and opinion. We keep harboring opinions and fail to look at facts…. like if someone is not answering the phone…..she never answers my call versus she did not take my call this afternoon.
- Take responsibility for what you are feeling and realize that that anger is only temporary. He makes me mad by leaving the clothes all over the place Versus I am mad because things are not kept in their proper place.
- Next time you come across a similar situation, how you are going to handle it? The next time you find the clothes lying on the floor, how are you going to react….what are you going to do to resolve the situation….
Be AWARE of Anger,
COOL The Anger,
and THINK Right!
You could watch a comedy movie on Anger Management and get some ideas on how to manage your own anger.
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